Fried Fish

Speedo: Hi, ASL?
Sleeping_beauty: Nice name! :) u like swimming?
Speedo: Yeah, love it. But I was called that even before we knew of the swim wear. Age?
Sleeping_beauty: LOL so wer u located?
Speedo: me in Delhi, n u? Age?
Sleeping_beauty: Cool. also in Delhi. Wot's wit this age hang-up?
Speedo: Sorry. So where in delhi u located?
Sleeping_beauty: Not so soon honey… what do you do, Speedo?
Speedo: Umm, a lot of things. Better thing to ask wud be what I don't… those are fewer.
Sleeping_beauty: Hmm, so tell me what is it u don't do?
Speedo: Nothing :)
Sleeping_beauty: ??? wazzat mean?
Speedo: Means I try and do everything once.
Sleeping_beauty: Smart, ar we?
Speedo: Hehehehe… just myself!! What u into, about etc?
Sleeping_beauty: I am doing psycho hon from…. Fugget it.
Speedo: Cool. So u un'stand people well?
Sleeping_beauty: Not yet, just reading those who did v well.
Speedo: n wot do you do when not readin these people.
Sleeping_beauty: chatting.
Speedo: what kind of chats are u into?
Sleeping_beauty: Any and all? 'cept the prying ones.
Speedo: U into cyber sex?
Sleeping_beauty: 'pends
Speedo: on what?
Sleeping_beauty: on who I am with… can be very boring
Speedo: Wanna try me?
Sleeping_beauty: u?
Speedo: No, my dad.
Sleeping_beauty: ur funny.
Speedo: Hmm. So shall we start?
Sleeping_beauty: Start? Haven't we already?
Speedo: What u wearing sweetheart?
Sleeping_beauty: black Victoria's Secret lingerie. Very sexy ;)
Speedo: Hmm. Let's start with ur ears. I don't like the taste of metal. Here I am removing the earrings.
Sleeping_beauty: But they're my lucky errings
Speedo: Well, now u have me. Your neck looks pale honey. Let me add some colour with my lips and tongue. Like it?
Sleeping_beauty: Hmm. ur good, hmm
Speedo: feel my tongue on ur lobe, behind ur ear now, on the back of ur neck. Isn't it too hot for that top. Shall we loosen things a bit? Here lemme help.
Sleeping_beauty: It's not a top. It's lingerie.
Speedo: K, cool. So let's junk the LINGERIE now
Sleeping_beauty: Wot bout u? rn't u going to lighten up?
Speedo: My Tee's off, can u feel my warm breath on your tits?
Sleeping_beauty: Don't like tits… nips is better
Speedo: Ok nips… wow they're getting hard with every lick of my tongue.
Sleeping_beauty: I like ur nips too. They're purple like bruises.
Speedo: I like ur bell button, so deep… I cud fall into it :)
Sleeping_beauty: I like ur smell… wot is it?
Speedo: My sweat… smells like cologne innit?
Sleeping_beauty: Yeah sure :( k don't tell me…
Speedo: My hand's between ur legs now
Sleeping_beauty: Yes and I don't normally wear any panties
Speedo: That's so cool just my kinda girl
Sleeping_beauty: Why are u still wearing those shorts? Rid them off u
Speedo: K. here goes the shorts and the undies
Sleeping_beauty: Wow cool hardware u got there sailor
Speedo: thnks. Ur software's also very inviting… Yum
Sleeping_beauty: Let's kiss now
Speedo: k. French? Or Indian?
Sleeping_beauty: What's Indian?
Speedo: Dry, non-stick type
Sleeping_beauty: K. French's cool wid me.
Speedo: 4 me too :) now I am parting ur legs
Sleeping_beauty: Am soo wet, ur good at this sailor
Speedo: N now am entering u, slow n sure. Am hard, very hard
Sleeping_beauty: Wot do u mean, slow n sure, sounds silly
Speedo: K wotever. Ur hands are grabbing my shoulders very tite
Sleeping_beauty: Hmmm. That feels so nice sailor.
Speedo: now we're beginning our ride… slowly like a boat on the sea
Sleeping_beauty: Hmmm… I like boat rides
Speedo: Hmmm
Sleeping_beauty: Omigod!!!
Speedo: Ooohhh am bout to…
Sleeping_beauty: Meeeeee toooo
Speedo: Aaaahh baby…
Sleeping_beauty: Was so gud…
Speedo: Amazing. Phew!
Sleeping_beauty: Guess u shud sleep now. Nite nite sailor.
Speedo: Hey… wait…
Speedo: BUZZ
Speedo: U there
Sleeping_beauty: SEEMS TO BE OFFLINE. PLEASE TRY LATER
Speedo: bitch!

Comments

  1. Try everything twice. You might love it both times.

    This post reminds me of someone.

    ReplyDelete
  2. hoo-ha.
    so u made it up or was some old memory.....hehe..kiddin..
    enjoyed it..

    ReplyDelete
  3. Hilarious......tempting even

    ReplyDelete
  4. LOL...have you ever read the chat/IRC excerpts on bash.org (click on the Top 100 quotes there - pretty funny stuff)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Well frig me, Great King.
    I didn't know you were going to publicise our converstaion.

    ReplyDelete
  6. i like the tits and nips bit! very entertaining i must say md:) And i might add, it had me in splits even though it wasn't really funny!

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  7. heloo...now sirjee...bhat is theeesee.....now i knowww all you people are bloody dhangerous......now sirjee....this is bheryyy bheryy disconcerting.....i think i need to talkk to madam jee...only she is knowing how to stop all you people saying...sayinggg this stuff u knoww....ram ram ram......(jus came in by wire from MIB)

    hehe.....in parts its hilarious....in parts itss ahemm....lets leave it at that shall we!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Haha, brought back tons of ICQ-in-the-middle-of-the-night-slumber-parties-at-15 memories. Three or four us would sit and wait for the dial-up connection to start working and then would indulge in rather lame cyber sex. Loadsa fun it was, especially when we'd do a klpd on an over-eager swedish dude with really bad english.

    Our nickname was 'I shot my boyfriend.' We were fairly regular at the 'Looking for Love' forum :D

    ReplyDelete
  9. M, twice is better innit ;)

    S'crow, was from the Internet X-Files :D

    Aripi... writing it, I was laughing too

    KM, will do!

    ~d, shiite... I thot u wudn't find out...

    Bloggerhead et Gammat, refer Aripi above.

    Scout, 'lame cyber sex' leading to an e-klpd... umm... sounds very unpromising...

    ReplyDelete
  10. Yeah-well, I did, Sailor! And I will have you know, GK, that I WILl get you back! Maybe those 'innocent' stories about shome random dude...
    (hahaha!)
    This interchange really ROCKED!
    I loved it!

    ReplyDelete
  11. I hope it lasted longer than reading the entire conversation which is about 2min and 37.689723 secs.

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  12. ~d, yeah I was ROTFL when I read ur first comment.... sure it rocks :D

    Missy, wow u timed it... but am sure u didn't stop to catch ur breath... wud've given u an extra five or so minutes... or maybe ur just better at this ;)

    ReplyDelete
  13. New Template. Again?

    This reminded me of a guy who once 'whispered' (remember the sleazy whoosh-zing sound of msn whispers?) to me in a poetry chatroom. He kept saying, "U r my slave. U r my slave. Get on your knees. I m whipping you." It was hilarious and scary.

    ReplyDelete
  14. umm......this shops makeover dissapoints a little

    ReplyDelete
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